Identity Versus Role

Simply put, identity is who we know ourselves to be on the inside, while role is how we present ourselves to others on the outside. Oftentimes, we get these two aspects of ourselves confused. We think we are our roles, and we definitely are not.

Have you ever had a boss say something to you that you didn’t want to hear? Perhaps you needed to improve some aspect of your job. You took the comment personally, absorbed the “criticism” internally into your psyche, and then, believed it was true!

Your role, the person others see, can, and often does, make mistakes. We are imperfect humans—we criticize, fail, misbehave, are afraid, and often think of ourselves as less than. Sometimes, we can put that role on, like a heavy coat, and wear it until the coat is a part of us. Then, we have a hard time believing that we are not our “coats”.

There is nothing further from the truth. Your internal Self, your identity, is always a ten. You are perfect, divine, growing, and expanding. Your identity, who you are, is the incredible, unstoppable, unbelievable you.

Wouldn’t life be easier if you took off your coat?

Wouldn’t life be more tranquil if you saw yourself differently?

Wouldn’t life be more fluid if you separated what others thought about you from what you know about yourself to be true?

I’d imagine you’d say yes to the above questions. Yet, how would one begin this process?

You might start by observing yourself. When you hear words that cause you emotional stress, stop, breathe, and ask yourself, “Is this about my job or about my spirit?” If about your job, then you can easily rectify the situation. If about your Self, then, most likely this is the other person’s misperceptions of you, and you can listen and learn; however, you can disregard the comment as your internal truth.

Another idea is to armor yourself beforehand with a different type of “coat”. You might want to repeat the following phrases in this mantra out loud for thirty days.

“No matter what others say to me, I’m a ten.

I learn easily and effortlessly and appreciate what others have to teach me.

I am not my role.

I am, in fact, the divine light of God in expression.

I am whole and holy.

I am peaceful, loving, and kind.

I am free.”

I challenge you to assess your “coat” and to learn to discern your identity from your role. By doing so, you will change the way you see, and change the way you live!

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