Practically every day someone asks “Can I pet your dog?”

Most of the time I say, “No, she’s working,” and the conversation drops. I’m left holding the leash wondering if they are still present and/or if they’ve walked away. What I’m sure we both wanted was some way to be in a relationship with one another. While the Seeing Eye dog could be the bridge between us, most of the time we both stand there on opposite sides wondering how to connect.

Since I can’t make the other person stay and converse with me, I need to find another way to engage, invite, and educate, to bridge the gap.

In a perfect world, here’s how the conversation would go.

“Can I pet your dog?”

“Oh, let me tell you about Ava! Do you have a few minutes?”

“Yes.”

“Ava is a very special dog; she’s a Seeing Eye Dog. Due to my blindness, she helps me see things I’d never see if she wasn’t present. She’s quite amazing! She helps me find curves, stairs, and overhanging tree branches, goes around light poles and benches, and watches for cars that might unexpectedly whiz by! Her job, at all times, is to keep me safe.” Then say, “What do you know about Seeing Eye Dogs?” …

“Oh, I know not to pet them.”

“Yeah, that’s true! What else!”

“Well, that’s all I know!”

“Do you know how come!”

“No, I just know not to pet.”

“Well, as I’ve said, her job is to keep me safe, so, can you see that if you’re petting her, how that might jeopardize my safety?”

“No, you’re just standing there!”

“Yep, that’s right! And, each time someone pets her makes eye contact, wiggles their fingers, and talks to my dog-which happens many, many times a day that takes a smidgen away from her training. Believe it or not, that’s a distraction. You see, eventually, the dog loses that pristine training. Over time, the dog cares more about other people than about me and keeping me safe!”

“Oh, I didn’t realize!”

“Yeah, I know you didn’t know! Perhaps you can help spread the word for me?”

“Yeah, it’d be my pleasure.”

Here are Five Tips from the Seeing Eye organization to guide and ensure the success of me and Ava.

5 Tips: When You Meet a Seeing Eye® Dog Team

Always remember, that distracting a Seeing Eye dog can make its owner vulnerable to harm.

1. Please don’t let your pet near a guide dog, even if your pet is leashed. Even allowing your pet to visit or “say hi”, for just a moment can cause the guide dog to lose focus on the important job he has to do

2. It’s helpful to let a person who is blind know that you are nearby and tell them if you have a dog with you.

3. Do not call the dog’s name, make eye contact, feed, or talk to the dog. It’s always best to treat the dog as if he is not there

4. Do not pet a guide dog when he is wearing the harness. If the dog is resting without his harness, ask the owner before you pet the dog and respect the person’s decision if they say no

5. Do not shout directions, take the person by the arm, or interrupt them when they are crossing the street. If you are concerned for their safety, ask them if they need help first

The next time you greet me or Ava, and if I say “No” you can’t pet my dog, don’t take it personally. I want to connect with you; however, it’s a matter of safety that I keep us on a long leash. I ask for your understanding, and perhaps we can have a cup of coffee to connect and talk about her and such. In connecting with me, instead of my dog, we will make the bridge and you will change the way you see and change the way you live.